Sunday, March 31, 2013

A Few Things I've Learned About Raising Boys

 I grew up in a house of females.  Aside from my dad, who passed away when I was 13, I had my mom and 2 sisters and myself.
And now I am a mother of 6 amazing boys.  I have learned some things over the years about them.  Some I have learned the hard way (don't we all?), and some just by observing.

1. Boys need respect.  They are young men and I have come to see that respect is huge to them. They need to not be accused or undermined.  They need to be believed in.

2. Boys are simple.  Feed them.  Water them.  Listen to their ideas on how they will change their world.  Feed them again.  Don't tell them how to fix their problem. Do help them find their clean clothes.  Listen to them.  Feed them again.

3. Boys are loyal.  They may get their nose bent out of joint every once in a while, but they stick with their friends.  They let things go, which is amazing if you're a woman who needs things to go full circle and have closure and all that.

4. Boys need to be boys.  Even when they are being homeschooled by a female who likes things to be pretty! Boys need to dig and climb and take things apart (ugh) and compete and dream and conquer.  God made them to lead and protect and change their world.  

5. Boys express their faith differently than girls.  I remember reading once about how girls will write pretty scripture verses and tape them all over the house.  They will bake a cake if you are sad. Boys just may find themselves telling someone strongly that they are a fool if they don't believe in God.  They stand in their faith in a different way.

6. Boys may pull away from their fathers for a bit as they head into manhood.  They need to become their own person.  But if their father shows them respect, they will end up with a close friendship.

7.  Boys love their Mamas.  I have made many, many mistakes.  I have failed to show respect too many times, focused much more on making them be 'good' than helping them with their vision, and raised my voice (and I mean raised!) when I should have listened better.  But at the end of the day, by the grace and goodness of God, I go to bed knowing my boys love me.  My oldest kisses me goodnight all the time and I LOVE it.  My second-born tells me he loves me while I'm driving him to work.  The older ones are becoming my friends, and it is sweet. The younger ones think there is no better mom in the world than me.  (The older ones know better now, but they've learned to keep that a secret...)

It isn't always easy to have a house full of testosterone.  But the more I understand 'em, the more I love 'em.

No comments:

Post a Comment